When I took my eldest child to the pediatrician for a check-up as a newborn baby, the nurse looked at the infant carrier at my son, looked up at my husband, looked at me, and then said,
6 Replies to “A Review: “I Don’t Have Your Eyes” by Carrie A. Kitze”
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Maybe not on the outside, but on the inside by the way they laugh, smile, likes, dislikes, love for things you love I am sure they look just like you (:
{{SO glad I found this awesome blog! thanks for commenting on my blog!}}
I am a transracial adoptee and often speak to TRA families. One mistakes I warn against is waiting for the child to ask questions. I strongly feel it is up to the parents to bring up the topics of race and adoption. Studies show children notice racial differences as late as 3 yrs old and some studies show much sooner.
Not talking about what is obvious to your child of color sends the message it should not be talked about. Please create an environment wherevthese conversations can be had.
Kevin, I really appreciate your comment here. I’d love to read some more about these conversations. If you have suggestions of good sites or resources, please let me know and I’ll post them for everybody. We definitely want to celebrate our children’s heritage and communicate that these conversations are absolutely safe and welcomed.
Kelly
I have to say that “I Don’t Have Your Eyes” by Carrie Kitze is one of my favorite books and has led to many good discussions with my beautiful daughters who were adopted from China. At almost 5 years old, our older daughter is beginning to notice the physical differences she and her almost 4 year old sister have from the rest of our genetically Dutch family, and we’ve had some lively discussions about our differences and our similarities.
Kevin, I hope you visit this site again and will be willing to share about your own experiences as a transracial adoptee. Voices like yours are so important to adoptive parents who seek to do and learn all we can to instill a healthy sense of self-image to our children.