I vividly remember being overwhelmed at the strange reality of parenting children I didn
10 Replies to “Foundations”
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I vividly remember being overwhelmed at the strange reality of parenting children I didn
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Once again, this is so, SO good. Thank you.
Thank you for that encouraging word Jerusha. I just looked at your blog– oh my goodness, what a beautiful family! Blessings on you, each one!
oh my this is soooooooooo very very helpfu…l thank you for writing this….. i have a love too for the children we have adopted but need to realize too that everything can’t be changed at once.. we got a sibling group from state of Missouri that were nine years and under… and 9 months ago we got a girl from russia who was an adoption disruption from another family,and we are still in adoption process…thanks for sharing this..
You are so welcome Sharon. Your family sounds amazing, and full! I’ve wondered about the issues of disruption. Those roots of rejection must be even deeper. Do you see the parenting process being different because of it? My heart just aches when I hear of a child whose adoption is disrupted. There is a boy we know who is in a children’s home now because his family just couldn’t keep him. So sad. I pray that God give you all you need in abundance for this daughter, and for your other children. He is more than enough and will take us for the ‘long haul!’
Such wisdom…and in an illustration that is easy for us to picture! Thank you for sharing what God has revealed to you! Our son was 21 months when he came home, but I still see areas where the foundation is weak. I love the idea that getting the foundation strong means being in it for the “long haul”. So often I want to see quick results. 🙂
Thank you Tara. I still wish I could see quick results, but I have to say that even this month we have seen some things in our 16 year old son, who came home at 5 years old from Russia, that we have been “building” for all these years, and it is just amazing and so beautiful to see the strength of it in him. I am in awe of God for what He has done. How old is your son now? I pray that you are strengthened for the “long haul” and sense the Father’s love for you Tara.
Beth, our son is 2 1/2 now. He’s only been home 9 months! Thank you for your prayers. 🙂
Beth,
My husband and I are feeling called to “older” child adoption (in a few more years). This is something I struggle with…I feel like I can understand that these children will have a great deal of attachment difficulties, sadness, trauma (I’ve even done my graduate research on this very topic). I’m ok with all of that (in theory), but I think the thing I still get hung up on is my complete inability to parent like everyone else I see. Thank you so much for this post and your assurance that it is ok to parent with your child’s past in mind…in fact, you recommend it. Additionally, your points to keep laying new foundations…Thanks again.
I’m so glad the post was helpful Kim. How exciting that you are called to adopt! And how wise you are to prepare by exposing yourself to adoption blogs like We Are Grafted In. I love reading the posts here. I know that God will give you all that you need, the manna for the day, once you bring your children home. There is a certain anointing that comes with the call, and it is part of our inheritance as His children, so you can count on it! You might be interested in another post I wrote about ‘parenting forward’ into our children’s identity, which is a kind of companion to this one, which as you noted, is more about recognizing the impact of the past on our parenting: http://hopeathomeblog.blogspot.com/2011/06/parenting-in-grace-identity.html
Let me know what you think! And may God bless you as you continue to hear His words for you about your life.
Beth,
Thank you so much for your response! I loved reading your link as well. I think I will link up with that soon on my blog (if you don’t mind) since I have a few friends considering foster care that read my blog. I love to hear from women and men who speak with honest practicality from a Christian perspective. I feel like many blogs effectively do one or the other. It’s not a criticism. I love all of those blogs too, but it is rare to see someone really try to marry those two things like you did. Again, thanks so much! I look forward to reading more of the wisdom that God has shown you in on this journey.