“This retreat was just what I didn’t know I needed. It was busy, fun, and I barely slept. Yet, I came home feeling so rested and refreshed.”
“This was the first time I’d ever sat down and heard about adoption from adoptees. It was a very meaningful and raw way to open up the weekend. I appreciated their perspective and everything that they shared. I’d love to be a part of this open conversation again.”
“It was so good to be back together again this year. I was really encouraged and challenged by the recurring themes of vulnerability and concept of no judgment, let’s just help each other get beyond the brokenness.”
“I was apprehensive coming, thinking the speaker would be a verbal version of high-fives and atta-boys and ‘you guys are heroes for adopting.’ . . . So needless to say, the content Curt provided was very appreciated. His ability to hold the importance of connection with God in one hand and neuroscience in the other hand brought encouragement and comfort.”
“It was such a gift to experience even one aspect of the main sessions, but all of them combined was like feeling a taste of the unity and love we will one day know in heaven.”
“Mark’s honesty and vulnerability reminded me of the ‘goodness’ of community and how much I have missed that over the past two years.”
“I am a Scrooge when it comes to forced fun at an event. The games you guys did were the perfect blend of funny and OPTIONAL. Anyone who wanted to be a fly on the wall could and anyone who had Olympic-size dreams to win a retreat game could do that as well. It felt like an inclusive environment all around.”
“Everything was perfect. Truly. We could not have felt more loved and cared for.”
In Amy Tan’s book The Joy Luck Club, women came around the mahjong table with intention so that they could together turn their attention away from big things that could disintegrate them and toward little things that integrated them. A young adult adopted from China who has been gathering over Zoom with other young people who were adopted likened their times together to those mahjong gatherings except, she explained, what they do is come together with intention to turn their attention away from the little things of everyday life towards really big things–their unique and shared adoption experiences. On this Friday afternoon, a few of those young people are inviting you to sit at the table with them. With Kelly Raudenbush facilitating in person, you will not only get to listen in but be part of the conversation with adoptees from various parts of the country joining us virtually.
About the facilitator:
Kelly Raudenbush
Kelly Raudenbush has been committed to caring for caregivers since she cofounded The Sparrow Fund in 2011. She earned her Master’s degree in counseling from Missio Seminary in 2002 but paused her professional practice to grow her own family. Kelly was part of the therapeutic team at the Attachment & Bonding Center of PA for 4 years before bringing counseling under the umbrella of The Sparrow Fund in 2019. She has a particular interest in (a) partnering with parents to help children process and understand their histories in healing ways; (b) encouraging, equipping, and empowering parents as they navigate the effects of trauma and build connections with each other and their children, and (c) helping caregivers and teachers in our own neighborhood and across the world best experience the power of relationship and grow it. Kelly has been married to Mark since 1998 and has four children, three biological and one adopted as a toddler from China in 2010.
Saturday Afternoon Breakout Sessions
Building Bridges With Your Children
Kids cannot always articulate what is bothering them, nor know how to build relationships. As parents, it is often our job to winsomely understand and draw them out. Drawing, role playing, or even petting an animal can be activities that help them to open up and express their feelings and concerns. In this session, Julie Lowe will share some practical ways we can build authentic relational bridges with our young children (and young adult children).
What do adoption and sex have in common? They both require ongoing conversations with our children that prompt all sorts of questions in us of what, when, and how. In this session led by experienced adoptive parent and educator Carolyn Ruch, we will explore these questions to empower us as parents with clarity and grace. We will never have these conversations perfectly, but we can have better conversations when we grow and learn together.
About the Speaker:
Carolyn Ruch
Carolyn Ruch is a former teacher, an author, speaker, child advocate, and steward of the Rise and Shine Movement: Equipping Adults to Protect Children from Childhood Sexual Abuse. But, her role as mother to seven children (three biological, one adopted, and three foster) is where she’s had her most joyous wins and her most painful losses. Now, a grandmother to three, she spends Fridays with Ken, her husband of 36 years, and two of the most adorable two-year-olds you’ll ever meet. Her other time is spent equipping adults in prevention, volunteering as testimonial coordinator with Women’s Walk with Christ, an international organization promoting discovery, healing, and transformation, and volunteering for TheSparrow Fund by joining other adoptive parents on the mountains and in trenches through their Spring and Fall Gatherings.
Understanding and Healing Trauma in Your Family
What is trauma? How does it manifest itself in adopted children and the families who love them? In this session, Dr. Phil Monroe will lead us in exploring the challenges of trauma and our responses to it as well as guide us to better understand how we can be agents of healing and growth for all of our children.
About the speaker:
Phil Monroe
Philip Monroe is a psychologist and leads Langberg, Monroe & Associates, a counseling practice in Jenkintown, PA. His specialities include trauma care, addictions, and problems with anxiety and depression. For the past 22 years, he has been a part of the faculty at Missio Seminary where he was chair of the Graduate School of Counseling. He is the founder of the Global Trauma Recovery Institute and now Visiting Professor. In addition to his clinical work, he also provides support to the Trauma Healing Institute which mentors and trains clergy around the world to better understand trauma in their communities. Phil is the adoptive father of two. You can read his personal and professional musings at www.philipmonroe.com.
We started The Sparrow Fund about 10 years ago with a desire to encourage and support families growing their family through adoption. We did that exclusively by offering grants to families adopting internationally to cover the cost to enroll in programs that would give them medical reviews of child referrals and counsel them through the referral process. The grants allowed us to meet a real need for families who might not have received this type of support otherwise.
What started small started to grow. We started offering training and connecting opportunities for foster and adoptive families including a marriage retreat Together Called which has become a community more than an event. We started serving in orphanages with the primarily goal of building relationships and helping both children and staff more deeply experience relationships.
As our team grew in 2017, it was the right time to pause and ask if all we were doing reflected who we are and where we believe we should be. As we considered the grant program and our retreats and trainings both here and in China, the words caring for caregivers were imprinted on our hearts. That’s what we want to be about. While the 101 grants we gave to families absolutely met a need and did real good for children and families, our team agreed that we could do a better job aligning our grants with the vision of caring for caregivers.
One of our Sparrow Services Grant families when they were in South Korea to adopt their daughter
We reimagined our grants and started our Sparrow Services Grant program in January 2018. Since then, we have brought 49 families into the program. We still help families access specialized medical professionals who will review their referral with them. But, we offer our Sparrow Services families more than just that. We walk with them; cheer them on; offer individualized support including but not limited to marriage support, a supplemental referral review from a narrative/relational lens, coaching to line up resources they may need once home, and personalized suggestions for building attachment. We commit to offering them pursuing care until they have been home with their child for a full year, no matter how long that may take. There’s no itemized list of all that a Sparrow Services Grants includes because we don’t want there to be a list. Lists feel too impersonal and limiting. We want to care for caregivers and help them in their becoming the caregivers they want to be.
We have two open application windows annually–January through the end of March and June through the end of September. And, as of January 1, 2022, the application is fully online!
While Giving Tuesday is our biggest fundraiser of the year, it’s more about vision-raising than fundraising. We know that the more people we have holding us up, the more effective helpers we will be. Our hope is for people to catch the vision for what we do and where we are headed as we care for caregivers. We want you to be motivated to give from that place with a desire to make sure that care happens and that you are a part of it.
It’s been a hard year for many. We have set our Giving Tuesday 2021 goal high, in spite of and because of this season of heightened need for the families we serve. Our giving goal for Giving Tuesday on November 30th is $50,000: $15,000 for our counseling program, $15,000 for our grant program for adoptive families, and $20,000 for general operating. To help us get there, five generous, committed donors have pledged to match all gifts dollar for dollar up to $25,000. What that means is that whatever you give–small, medium, or large–your donation will be doubled until we reach $25,000.
We also want to give a little something to you not to convince you to give or pay you back for it. That would take away from the meaning of your gift. We just really like giving, and so do our friends at Advent Blocks. So, we’re randomly choose one Giving Tuesday donor to receive their own set of Advent Blocks to make their family Christmas celebration a little sweeter.
So, here’s how to join us:
Click on the yellow button on the top of our website that says DONATE and choose GIVING TUESDAY as the purpose.
Write a check to The Sparrow Fund, put GIVING TUESDAY in the memo field, and mail to 124 3rd Avenue Phoenixville PA 19460
The movie Found, released on Netflix October 20th, tells the story of three teen girls adopted from China as they explore their histories and travel back to China together. On Tuesday, November 16th at 8pm EST, we’re offering a space (via Zoom) for a small group of teens who were adopted themselves (not just from China) to gather to talk about the movie–what they noticed, what made sense to them, what didn’t make sense to them.
If you are the parent of a teen who may want to join us or are connected to one, forward this email or text them a screenshot of it. We’d love to have them part of it. They can let us know they are interested through this Google form: https://bit.ly/3GuTdI0
February 12th marks the start of the Year of the Ox and gives an opportunity for families to celebrate their child’s heritage in the case of families with children from China and other Asian countries as well as an opportunity for all families to talk about people all over the world and the significance of holidays for bringing families and communities together.
Here are some parent-friendly resources to inspire ideas for how you might be able to take the opportunity to connect with your children.
Readables
Chinese New Year – Did you know there’s a whole website dedicated to Chinese New Year? Make sure to explore all it has to offer including taboos to avoid like saying happy new year to someone still in bed!
22 Things You Should Know – Why fish is a traditional food, what the lantern festival has to do with it, red envelopes, and what’s not allowed.
History.com’s Chinese New Year 2021 – Updated for the year of the ox, this is a nice overview to explain things like long noodles, house cleaning, and red envelopes.
Interesting videos to watch
Lunarfest 2021 – Click here to access Yale-China’s online offerings for families in light of COVID restrictions that have canceled in-person celebrations. They’ve creatively put together 16 virtual red envelopes with something special families can access each of the 16 days of celebration including trivia, watching martial arts, shadow puppet demonstrations, crafts, and recipes.
Bet You Didn’t Know – Did you know 1/6th of the world’s population celebrates the lunar new year? This 3-minute video published by the History Channel is a nice simple overview.
The Myth Behind the Chinese Zodiac – This 4-minute animation tells the story of the Great Race, the fable behind the 12 animals assigned to each year.
The Chinese Zodiac Explained – In this TED talk from technologist and Chineasy entrepreneur ShaoLan Hseuh, you’ll learn about how asking your zodiac sign is a polite way to ask your age and other interesting cultural facts about the animals that mark each year.
Chinese Dragon Dance – This video of traditional Chinese New Year festivities was filmed in Shanghai in 2011 and is fun for kids and grownups alike to watch.
Crafts + Activities
Paper lanterns – Find here some easy instructions for a classic craft that you can use to decorate for the holiday.
Good luck banner – This will take you to easy instructions for making a traditional new year banner and an explanation to why it’s displayed upside down.
Lion dance puppet – With this template, you can make a lion dance puppet that looks like the ones in traditional parades.
Printable red envelope template – The template is free, but it may end up costing you something since traditional red envelopes with money inside are a traditional gift for Chinese New Year.
Chinese character decorations – Click here to download printables for 8 different Chinese characters (faith, hope, love, friendship, luck, courage, peace, and wisdom) that you can hang up as is or invite your children to decorate.
For us, Giving Tuesday always has been more about vision-raising than fundraising. We know that the more people we have holding our work and us up, the more effective we will be. We want you to catch the vision for what we do and where we are headed as we care for caregivers. And, we want that to be what motivates you to give – a desire to make sure that care happens and that you are a part of it.
It’s been a hard year for many. We have set our Giving Tuesday 2020 goal high, in spite of and because of this season of heightened need. Our giving goal is $30,000: $10,000 for our counseling program, $10,000 for our grant program for adoptive families, and $10,000 for general operating. To help us get there, three generous, committed donors have pledged to match all gifts dollar for dollar up to $15,000.
We also want to give to you not because we want to convince you to give to us or pay you back in some way for donating. That negates the meaning of a gift. We just want you to know how grateful we are for you, the people who help us keep helping. And, simply put, we love giving.
When you give $50 or more on Giving Tuesday, your gift will be doubled as it gets matched, and we’ll send you two hand-lettered Scripture printables created by our friend Rachel at Minipress. And, they really are altogether lovely.
Here’s how you can join us:
Click on DONATE on the top of the page and select “Giving Tuesday” from the dropdown list.
Text GIVE to 855.618.1364
Send a check to The Sparrow Fund with Giving Tuesday in the memo line and send to 124 3rd Avenue Phoenixville PA 19460
They really couldn’t be more perfect for right now. We think all our last days of online school, virtual graduation days, wedding watching parties at home, quarantined birthdays, and Father’s Day (yeah, that’s coming up) need them.
Shirts are a super soft triblend and come in toddler, youth, and grownup sizes. Order through THIS ONLINE FORM for $20 a shirt plus a $5 flat-rate shipping cost no matter how many you order.
And, help us spread the word! We want to sell 50 of our in-stock shirts this week to raise money so that we can keep serving children and families during these challenging days and for many more days to come!
We can practice gratitude and giving anywhere. And, maybe, home is the best place to be to practice.
Use our calendar to encourage your own gratitude and giving right now. Do each thing as designated each day, or choose ones to do in whatever order you want. There aren’t rules, just ideas to get you started.
