Since coming home with Silas, we get a lot of comments from people about how wonderful God’s plan is and how much better his ways are than our own. Talking about God’s plans with this cliche simplicity is something we Christians love to do. But when it was said to me in reference to infertility and adoption, something about it really irked me, and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it until I really sat down to think about it.

Here’s the thing. Adoption was always a part of our plan. The infertility part wasn’t. So, adoption was not some “new plan” from God that came about because our original plan didn’t work out. In my mind, they are two completely unrelated things. The only thing that ties them together for us is the timing. We didn’t choose to adopt because of infertility. We chose to adopt because God called us to it long before we ever knew we would deal with infertility, and because it was as much a desire of our hearts as having biological children was.

And here’s another thing. I do not believe that the infertility was God’s plan for us. I don’t believe that the pain and struggle our birth mom had to endure in life was a part of God’s plan for her. I don’t believe that parents who can’t have children and children who can’t have parents is ever a part of God’s plan. But I do believe that God, knowing the challenges and pain we would have to face, did make a plan for us and Silas to have each other. Because, God “causes all things to work together for the good of those who love Him.” (Romans 8:28) And this is so, SO good.

And one more thing, isn’t it God’s plan for all of us, as Christians, to care for the orphans….not just those of us who deal with infertility?

“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” James 1:27

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Mindy and her husband, Nick, adopted their son, Silas, domestically in August of 2013 after seven years of marriage and two years of unexplained infertility.  They live in Southern California, where Nick is a pastor and elder at ROCKHARBOR church and Mindy is a part-time teacher. She also hosts an infertility and adoption group each month, where she gets to do life with women who share her deepest pain and her greatest passion. She blogs at Finding Sunday.