I have some friends I’d like you to meet – Kavita, Jasu, Somer, Krishnan, and Asha. I met them here at the beach on vacation; I’ve only known them for a few days. As much as I’d like to speak to them and allow you to do the same, we can’t; they are alive only in a well painted portrait of words. But, they’ve spoken to me.
There aren’t many books in which I find myself drawn in some way to all the characters. Maybe one or two resonate with me, not all. Shilpi Somaya Gowda’s
I was simply searching for an African doll. That’s all. I emailed a missionary who our church supports, knowing she works with village women who do crafts. Maybe one of them could make a doll. The missionary told me she no longer worked with those women but gave me an email to get in touch with one, Mary Magdalene.
All I did was send her a simple email asking if she or one of the women she works with could make a doll.
But, her response left me stunned. She told me that only 4 days earlier–she gave me even the exact time of day–she had cried out to the Lord asking him to bring someone to buy her crafts.
She had been widowed twice, both husbands had been killed in war, leaving her with 9 children to raise on her own. But, what we would see as a desperate situation did not stop her from bringing 7 orphaned children into her home. One of the children she now cares for was abandoned at the age of 6 because it was discovered that she is HIV+, which she contracted from her parents, the ones who abandoned her. Mary is a strong and faithful woman who trained women in her village to make beads and helped them learn how to sell them in the marketplace. They pool the money made and split it between them so that all are provided for.
But, here she was, crying out for provision, desperate to see God at work. 4 days later, she received my email. I encouraged her to send me what she had–I will find people to buy it, I told her. Just send it, I said. And, she did. She sent jewelry and more jewelry and handmade animals and more jewelry…and two little dolls. The dolls that started it all.
So, here I am with a dining room full of what some may see as paper beads and small animals but what I see as precious jewels and treasures, created by women sitting together in community, caring for the least of these, in faith that He will provide.
Join me in being part of God’s promise to them.
Email me or contact me via Facebook where pictures will be posted for purchase. Or, visit the dedicated page I just created here on We Are Grafted In with pictures and prices for some of the pieces as well.
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Forever changed by our experience of being adopted and adopting, Kelly is a stay-at-home mom/manager to 4 children–the youngest of whom is from Baoji, Shaanxi, China–who is a professional juggler, juggling her calling as wife and mother with a small online store (Jiayin Designs), editing, administrating this site, and, now, joining the efforts with
Have you checked out this page featuring ministries who have taken on the cause of helping orphans and encouraging adoption worldwide?
One of the organizations listed there is Bring Me Hope. Bring Me Hope works with hundreds of volunteers every year to deliver love and encouragement to Chinese orphans. Their mission is to meet the Chinese orphan
The movie opens with the image of a young Chinese girl with hair hanging down in her eyes, flushed cheeks, a runny nose, and tears streaming down her face.
Lord, meet me, join me. Make my aim, Lord, this Advent to bring joy to you through the giving of myself–my time, my plans, my agenda–for you to use. My gift of myself to you must take priority over my gifts to my family and friends. After all, it is your birthday we are celebrating–not mine, not my children’s, not my husband’s, not my friends’–your birthday, Lord. Part of my gift to you is loving the people you have put in front of me–those who are easy to love and those who are not. I want to give you my response to lonely people around the world–the orphan, the widow, the ones who are all alone, the ones who others have passed by. But, I do not know how to respond. Forgive me when I do not take the opportunities you have put in front of me to do it. Help me, Lord, to be able to do it.
Keep at the front of my mind that the cleaning of my spiritual house must take priority over the cleaning of my physical one, that nourishing my family’s souls is more important than holiday meals, that encouraging peace and harmony in my home is more beautiful than twinkling lights. Remind me, Lord, that in-filling times alone with you must happen alongside outpouring times with others. Remind me, Lord, and enable me to act in obedience with that reminder.
May an awareness of your presence fill me every moment of my day so that rather than you being squeezed out of my busyness, I will be aware of you walking with me as my shepherd. You are the only one this Advent season who can help me find those ordinary yet amazing experiences of joy that you provide with such grace and mercy and love amongst all the responsibilities, pressures, and heartaches of this world.
Lord, meet me; join me; forgive me; enable me; remind me; be present with me; reveal yourself to me.
Amen.
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Kelly is a stay-at-home mom/manager to 4 children–one of whom is celebrating her first Christmas home this year. She adapted this prayer from an anonymously written advent prayer she received at a women’s Bible Study that inspired her to take it and write one for herself. Though she’d love to spend more time writing, she is a part-time editor and part-time blog-surfing junkie, always on the lookout for good resources and essays to post on this site that are way better than what she could come up with. You can learn more about their adoption story as well as follow day-to-day life on their personal blog.
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When we reach 200 followers, there will be a giveaway for one lucky follower.
I am a researcher—ask my husband. He’d probably tell you I overthink and research, well, nearly everything. So, in an effort to use my research skills (or obsessive compulsive nature?) for good, I put together some questions that I would suggest using when you are calling adoption agencies for the purpose of selecting one for your international adoption.
When you have a list of agencies you want to contact, find a quiet place, get your paper and pen ready, and get your well-charged phone in hand. Pray for discernment and wisdom, and trust that He will guide your family in the path He has called you to.
Ask to speak to the person who directs the specific country program in which you are interested. Make a note of his or her name.
Start open-ended- “I’d like to learn more about your X program.” Allow the agency representative to talk freely. Not only will it provide you with answers to your questions or confirmation for what you already know, it can raise issues that you might not have considered. And, it will also give you a feel for the person’s personality as well as the culture of the office, how they work, and what they value or see as important to communicate to potential adoptive families. Remember that you will be working very closely with him or her, revealing a lot about your family.
What makes your agency different or stand out from other agencies?
Do you have a religious affiliation? Do all the individual staff members?
How many staff people do you have?
Are your overseas staff contract employees or do they represent various agencies? I believe it is to families’ benefit if the overseas staff works exclusively for your agency.
How many years has your agency been working with adoptions in this program?
How many placements did you make in this program last year?
Does your agency do any sort of relief programs in the country beyond arranging adoptions?
What should we expect communication to be like? Will we receive regular phone calls or email updates while we wait?
How do adoptive families from your agency connect? Do you offer gathering events for local families? Do you have an active yahoo group or other online community? Do you intentionally connect waiting families or families newly home with their children? This may or may not be important to you. But, it is helpful know what they offer. If you do not desire to connect with families now, you may want to later for your child’s benefit.
Do you help families prepare their dossier?
What type of parental training programs do you offer? Is this an additional cost? Is it required?
How long is your current waiting list for a placement? How long would you expect we would wait? Look for obvious discrepancies between agencies. Agencies that are vastly different than others should make you ask the question why.
Do you make the travel arrangements for me (i.e., plane tickets, hotel reservations, etc.)? Do you take care of in-country needs such as our guide, interpreter, money (e.g., orphanage donation) transfer, etc.? Not all agencies handle this the same. It is very helpful if your agency wires money for things like your orphanage donation if it is required so that you do not have to carry large sums of money on your person. And, though many people like to make their own travel arrangements, if you find that you are traveling in a hurry at the end of your wait as sometimes happens, it is a real benefit to be with an agency who does these things for you if you want them to.
Do you work with specific agencies in my state (if the agency is not local to you) for our home study and postplacement follow-up reports?
What is required for X program with regards to postplacement reports? What kind of follow-ups do you offer? Do you offer anything additional to the country’s requirement?
Can you provide a description of all fees, broken down so that I can compare agencies?
Does your agency provide options or suggestions for grants or financial assistance?
Can you provide me with a copy of the contract prior to paying an application fee to you?
Do you have families who have used you recently who we could call or email? Make sure these are recently formed adoptive families (families who have been home for less than 1 year) so that the information they provide to you as current as possible. The most helpful information I got about our agency and about adoption in general was from other adoptive families.
Take copious notes as you are able. Write down the answers to the questions as well as just feelings you have. Follow up with the families who have used the agency and keep those notes together.
Remember that though this may feel like an overwhelming decision, the Lord desires for you to seek Him in it and take the burden from you. And, He will bless you in your decision as you surrender it to Him.
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Kelly is a stay-at-home mom/manager to 4 children who don”t seem to appreciate her researching skills unless it involves coupons for Chick fil A or a new toy. She is a part-time editor and part-time blog-surfing junkie, always on the lookout for good resources and essays to post on this site. And, she will talk adoption with anyone willing to listen. You can learn more about their adoption story as well as follow day-to-day life on their personal blog.
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When we reach 200 followers, there will be a giveaway for one lucky follower.